Life Ain't Easy

We are all trying to reach some goal. Whether it be fame, fortune, family, friends, etc. we all have ulterior motives. So what do I mean you ask? Stop complaining. My wonderful mentor (and sister) told me in a fairly abrupt but honest and fair statement that "if I don't like something about myself, change it". Since that moment, I realized I had complete control. I have COMPLETE control over my attitude, my emotions, and my perceptions. Only I can choose how I treat others and how I value myself.

Ok...so I digress. My ultimate point is...we are focusing on the least important things. We are focusing on the end result when the end result is ALWAYS the same. So why not focus on the now...the events that happen and lead up to the end?

I will expand more later. Goodnight

Everybody Wants to be Loved

Just a quick thought for tonight...

Why do we like people who we know don't like us?
And why do we like people who are completely opposite and complete morons?

Just a thought. Why can't I just take the easy and obvious route.

Rants and Raves

Well... today its just me ranting and raving about something that TRULY bothers me. I wish I could say its a Nashville thing, and part of me does want to blame Nashville, but to be honest its every where. Why do people feel they should talk poorly about someone yet they continually make plans to hang out with or spend time with them.

If you have the nerve to say you don't like someone or want to be around that person, why do you continue to agree to plans or make commitments to go to events with them? If that is the kind of person you are, I want nothing to do with you. I don't care to be around people like that because what is to say they aren't speaking the same way about me?

I am not encouraging ANYONE to be mean, rude, disrespectful, or hateful to anyone. But if you don't like someone or agree with how they behave, why purposefully put yourself around them? You create your own drama and problems.

That's all.

Everyone has an Angle

A midst this whole SOPA debacle I can't help but think that everyone has an angle. Who you ask? The government, Google and all online search engines and websites, individuals, and artists/ corporations.

The government - easy way to limit freedom of speech masked as a way to protect others. Political campaign to sound supportive of creativity and intellect. Taking control over what the free market and capitalism should be monitoring. Basically - its seems like another push for control. Also, another way to keep foreign entities from competing with America.

Google/ search engines and websites - this is a great platform for themselves. Acting as the gateway to freedom and knowledge. Problem? They still have control over what you see online and do not. Guess what everyone, there are tricks to ENSURE your website is viewed first with certain cue words in the text. Google masks itself without showing that with all this control and information, they can push their own biases. Who is to stop them?

Individuals - we want everything for free. We want movies and we don't want to pay. We want knowledge and don't want to give those credit who have provided it. It's in our nature. We steal, lie, and cheat. We want and we don't want any obstacles to get in the way of obtaining those wants.

Artists/ Corporations/ Manufacturers of the information and intellectual property - money. They want to get paid. They don't want to be cheated. But sometimes they also want to get paid for things that have no dollar value. They also want a monopoly or control over what we consume and how. Google, although opposing the
bill, wants control over what we consume and how (just to a different capacity).


So what do I think? Everyone has an angle. Everyone WANTS something from this or opposes this because they don't want to lose something. Yes, intellectual property should be protected. Yes, foreign entities should not be able to pirate our citizens' intellectual property and give it for free. BUT...I also believe it is the responsibility of those who produce this material to protect what they create and take these matters to court just as everyone else does. Capitalism works and their are thousands of businesses who pay employees to monitor this.

Well, there is my soap box. I could go on and on, but truly...I just want to read the bill myself and make my on judgement call!

Mean Girls

Why do women have to put one another down to feel better about themselves? Why are we so hateful, hypocritical, and self involved? Sometimes I hear the words some girls say and all I wonder is.."why was that so necessary to say?"

We all know how hard it is for a girl to feel good about herself and see her own beauty. Why do we knock her down to help ourselves? If I do not like or agree with a girl or her behavior, I make it known and try to remove myself from her. I am not looking to make her the priority of my conversations or life and I am not looking to spend my days downgrading and trash talking her either. She has the right to be herself and not feel she has to change.

This isn't a long rant tonight....just an important one. To all the women out there, show your beauty by seeing the beauty in each other. And take an old but good saying to heart, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

All Who are Weary

We are not special because we are lonely, tired, depressed, or empty. We are not special because we "want a relationship" or we are "working too hard". These are actually things that unify us with one another. Being lonely is not something only you experience. How you manage through these times...that is what makes you unique.

My sister who has been my inspiration and motivation in life made a comment tonight about how it's strange but she just really wants a relationship. Her reasoning being she is from and never leaving (any time soon) Jacksonville, and it is lonely. My response...You aren't the only one. Just because you live in your home town doesn't make you special or mean you are the only one wanting a relationship. And I can tell her this because our relationship is strong enough for me to be honest and not skirt around the tough answers.

My point is....find unity in your weaknesses. We all feel them. But don't justify one another. Hold each other accountable. Love, but require accountability and self discovery. Require each other to become better while still showing love, compassion, and understanding.

That last paragraph sounded like a great ending, conclusive and "warm and fuzzy". The problem? Easier said than done. We love and revel in pity. It gives us an excuse to not change. Likewise, if those we are close to are in that same state of pity, it gives us a reason to not only judge them but use it as justification for ourselves.

Maybe that is why God says, "come to me all ye who are weary and weak". Maybe He knew that we just couldn't give to those what is needed because we are in so much need ourselves. We use others as a buoy, similar to drowning victims. Instead of allowing others to save us, we drown them in the process. We say "well...at least I am not like 'so and so'" or "at least I didn't do that...". God does not. And I am so grateful for that.

Trust in Me...TFB

Onto the things that I see most often...Trust funds and their lovely TFBs. Now...as a disclaimer: This is ABSOLUTELY NOT true of EVERY wonderful TFB. But I am commenting on a select group. If at any point it sounds like I am classifying all to be one in the same...this is not the case. I just don't want to have to be grammatically and politically correct throughout this entire post.

(FYI...TFB stands for Trust Fund Baby - an extremely unpolitical and judgmental term given to me by a client of mine who was also a "TFB" ).

So for the group I AM classifying... I pray every day I never create a monster like you. If and when I become successful, I only want enough to satisfy my needs, create a comfortable living, have something to give to my children and great grandchildren so they don't have to struggle and so they can chase their dreams.

Everyday at work I either find myself envying or pitying someone. Either way it has helped me realize how trivial money truly is. It is an item that can give you great toys and destroy great bonds and relationships. If my children or grandchildren dream of starting a business or going through a specialized educational program, I want that to be a possibility and reality.

What I fear - well, let me describe the person who I have had the pleasure of meeting who I pray everyday that my children or friends never become. This man has never worked a day in his life. He is given (for free) 4,000 dollars a month and STILL spends more than he has. He blames everyone for his mistakes, he lets women take advantage of him, and he is entitled. He wants everything for free and he tries to cheat the system so he can get more of the hard earned dollars his family earned to provide a good life for him.

Many people save every single penny and deny themselves of luxuries in order to give their descendants a better life. They build their wealth so their grand children and great grandchildren can afford a good education and can have families and provide for them. Instead their legacy, their sweat and endless hours of work get thrown to the "swine" as I call them.

"Do not throw your pearls to swine" is where I get that term. If you have something of value, don't give it to those who will trample over and ruin it.

If I ever have the blessing of a decent living and fortune, I hope I can leave enough to help my family live comfortably and feel capable of big dreams...but not so much that they don't have to work and earn what is given them.

Dear eHarmony...

I am tired of your stupid persuasions to get me to find cyber love. I know I may have failed more times than I have succeeded it obtaining even a simple relationship, but I refuse to say that at the young age of 24 I need the help of the internet and someone telling me who they are rather than allowing me to discover them.

The best part is getting to know someone and how unique they are. I don't want a resume of fancy phrases that basically say you like to eat and talk and have hobbies.

Crazy as it may sound, I still believe in meeting someone randomly in a crowd and falling in love. I believe that as we live our own lives, someone will cross our path and join us in our journey and us in theirs. I don't want to have to tell someone why they should love me for fear that I don't live up to my word. Rather, I want someone to love me for what they see.

Crazy I know. So eHarmony... if in 10 years my ideals prove untrue, then and only then will I admit failure and come crawling to you. Until then, please allow me to live without your annoying commercials and Ads telling me I need you to find love.
Thanks!

Sincerely,
Fairy Tale Believer

Saving Money and the American Misconception

As we enter the coldest months of the year, even in Florida, I can't help but think about one comment I continually hear and have even heard myself say once or twice..."I'm saving money by not turning on the heat". Throughout the United States there are many citizens (primarily young adults) bearing 60 degree temperatures in their homes and below in order to save money on their utilities.

Yes...this seems sensible from first glance. But, what we fail to recognize is that many of these same individuals "saving money" on utility bills are also spending a good amount of money on fast food, restaurants, alcohol, cigarettes, entertainment, video games, music, shopping sprees, etc (not necessarily all).

On top of all these expensive ways and might I add unnecessary ways to spend money, I will be the first to admit that when one is uncomfortable in their home, they find ways to get out of the house. Let me explain - if you are so cold in your home because you refuse to turn on the heat, you probably don't want to be in your home. After a long day of work and a desire to avoid your own home, you decide to go to the local restaurant to have a drink and appetizer (10-12 dollars approx).

I have been a victim of this once. I lived in a home that I felt so uncomfortable in, I can honestly say I went to the local bar almost EVERY day after work. This can come to over 50 dollars a week upwards to 400 dollars a month (trust me I've seen the bank statements).

So....next time you decide to "save money" try saving money by making your home more comfortable and desirable. Focus on your needs and cut out the extras. Cooking dinner, going to the gym (instead of the bar),  reading a book, and buying a bottle of wine versus one glass a day (which you feel obligated to tip on) can save more money than not turning on your heat...and you can enjoy these activities when you enjoy being at home!

Good luck and Happy Saving in 2012!

First Week of 2012

I know there is way too much hype over a new year and it often gets annoying to hear all the empty promises people attempt to make. The problem is not the new year, it is that so many people are trying to become a "new" person rather than focus on somethings that can be improved.

A new year gives us a chance to assess the things we were pleased with the prior year and find opportunities to make improvements. I like who I am and in no means plan to become "new"! I do however want to realign my priorities for 2012.

This week has been extremely successful for me so far. Work has been extremely hectic yet productive, I have fought the desire to be lazy and won (2 times so far and counting), and I have been better about saying no to spending money that I do not have.

So for this first week of the new year, instead of commenting on how everyone's motivation will die out by February, I am encouraging everyone to have a very productive first week of 2012. Even if it only lasts one week, at least you have that!